In celebration of Father’s Day this Sunday, Dark Elf Dice is proud to bring you a special edition of Who Would Win in a Fight? In honor of fathers everywhere, we bring you two of television’s most famous dads to square off toe-to-toe in a pugilistic showdown. This is a classic TV rumble, so put the kids to bed early and pop a big bowl of popcorn because this week’s hypothetical slap-down begins now and it’s time to ask:
Who would win in a fight: Ward Cleaver or Jim Anderson?
And in this corner: Leave it to Beaver’s very own Ward Cleaver!
Ward Cleaver looks like a guy who can handle himself. Sure, he sits in an office all day, but he still looks like he keeps in good shape and could slug it out with the best of them. He grew up a farm kid and served in World War II before graduating from college and marrying his high school sweetheart. He’s a classic 1950’s dad who works hard all day and wants nothing more than to come home to read the paper and eat a hot, home cooked meal. Suburban living would be easy, but every night Ward finds himself having to dispense moral wisdom to his two sons — Wally and the Beaver. The boys are forever getting into crazy mishaps and like all good fathers everywhere, Ward has to set ’em straight. And set ’em straight he does with wry humor and a gentle strictness that makes him one of television’s most enduring dads.
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Boys, don't make me come up there!
Strength: 14
- Endurance: 14
- Dexterity: 13
- Intelligence: 16
- Wisdom: 18
- Charisma: 17
- Willpower: 15
- Special Abilities: white collar professional, handy with tools, wise as Yoda but much taller
- Famous Quote: “Wally, believe it or not, I was your age once. ”
And in this corner: Father Knows Best‘s very own Jim Anderson!
There are a lot of similarities between Jim Anderson and Ward Cleaver. Both are white collar professionals, both live in the suburbs and both have adoring wives and children. Both men are so similar in fact it’s kind of creepy — sort of an Invasion of the Body Snatchers thing going on, almost as if they were cloned. Like Ward, Jim is a prototypical 1950’s dad who works hard all day and comes home to the paper and a hot meal. When he’s not managing his insurance business he’s fixing things around the house and dispensing pearls of wisdom to his children Betty, Bud and Kathy. He’s thoughtful, charming and well-respected by his community. Jim Anderson truly is a wonderful TV dad, but does he have the right stuff to knock Ward Cleaver flat on his butt?
- Strength: 13
He really does know best.
- Endurance: 13
- Dexterity: 13
- Intelligence: 16
- Wisdom: 18
- Charisma: 17
- Willpower: 16
- Special Abilities: white collar professional, handy with tools, wise as Yoda but much taller
- Famous Quote: “Bud, for your information, I look barely in my ’40s. That hardly qualifies me for the home for the aged. Yet.”
And the winner is… Ward Cleaver!
This is a great fight that goes late into the second round. Although Jim Anderson comes out swinging, he just can’t out-muscle Ward Cleaver. Maybe it’s the 10-20 pounds Ward has on him, or perhaps it’s Ward’s background as a farm kid and World War II vet. Maybe Ward simply has a better head game and psyches Jim out with that steely gaze of his. Whatever it is, Ward Cleaver takes Jim Anderson down hard with a wicked combination of lefts and rights that leaves the insurance manager flat on his back, dazed and confused. The next day at school Wally and Beaver can brag to the gang that their dad is the toughest of them all. Happy Father’s Day everyone!
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